Fall

It’s crisp today.  Or “sharp” as my newly three year old son put it.  I almost swooned as much as when I said there was a bite in the air, and he flung his arms around me and whimpered because he was afraid it was going to bite him.  I’ll spare you the anecdotes though, assuming you’re tired of hearing about how cute and wonderful my kid is.  (Though it’s true)

It’s early fall, and I’m happy.  Dare I even say content with where my life is?  That’s a real thing, right?  Being happy with where you are, who you are, and stuff and junk?  It reminds me of moving here almost two years ago, and hating it, and now pretty much loving it.  I have friends, Rowan has friends, heck, even our fish has friends.  (That’s a really funny story actually.  I bought Rowan’s fish two more friends, and it was apparently “buy one get on free” and I didn’t realize it, and it was two days before I noticed that there were four fish in the tank, and not three.  Okay, it’s more sad than funny, but at least I’ll know how many are left when they start dying off because I forget to put water softener in there.  Which I do a lot.  I’m a bad fish mom. )

Things are good.  Even though my car and I collided with a boulder last week, and now I have to pay the thousand dollar deductible, and I won’t have a car for a little while and my body is a bit sore.  As cliché as it sounds, it was a kick in the pants for me.  It made me grateful/happy/amazed that no one else was hurt, and I wasn’t hurt more.  Immediately after I stopped my car from wreaking havoc on Lewisburg, I just sat there, dazed, until two guys (who if I were going to judge based on appearance, would have been the kind of young kids to just pass by, staring, judging, and being a general pest to society.  But it’s the south and most people aren’t like that.  They help when they see someone is in need, and genuinely care.  That’s still a thing, right?  Genuine, nice people?) helped me out of my car and didn’t even laugh when I handed the police officer an oil change slip instead of my registration.  They helped the officer move the rock out of the road, and stayed until they were sure I was taken care of.  That accident, while a pain in the butt, did actually serve a purpose.  I’ve made some good changes, mostly in attitude, in the last couple of days, so much so that even Rowan has noticed.  We were playing fire engines on the floor, and he put his head on my leg and said, “we’re happy.”  (Sorry, one more anecdote)  I’m not stressing about stuff anymore.  Things like the future and other stupid stuff going on that I can’t control.  Even things that I can control I’m not stressing about because that’s dumb.  And if there is anything that I’ve learned from the past couple of years is that I’m not dumb.  My energy and time can be directed toward much better things.  Like weeding out my closet and putting out all of our fall clothes.  Giving some of Rowan’s old toys to the kid my sister watches and needs much more than Rowan or my basement does.  Oh, and going for bike rides and hikes and oh-my-goodness maybe going out once or twice WITHOUT my kid, and being a real-live-person that doesn’t have a short blond person fused to her hip.

So there you have it.  I’m good, alive, happy, and my only complaint is that my lips are really chapped because I still insist on sleeping with the air conditioner on because I like the white noise, and my uncle is visiting and is using the fan, and it makes the air really dry and cold.  Oh, and I could quite possibly have a problem with run-on sentences, though I think that’s highly unlikely because while I was not a great student because my head was in the clouds, and I only wanted to read the books I wanted to read, and not text books, or do homework, I was just naturally good at english and grammer, and stuff and junk like that.